“I quit!” He scribbled on a plane paper and jumped off the
building. He died. “loser,” sniggered the world. Life went on as before.
Quitting got no solution. It never does.
I have lost a student, one of my best friends
and one of my colleagues' turned friends' teenage first born son to it and let
me confess, it isn’t easy to bear the loss and to confront the losses in the
faces of the we never knew family members, especially parents.
While again, there are also those kinds, the eraser-hearts who can move on.
For me, my observations, my memories remain
static, irreplaceable.
2 decades past...
My best friend attempted suicide due to
parental pressure of scoring full marks (this was the talk of the town when he
passed away) in physics/maths. Born to a genius family and a withdrawn person
in nature, he quite made the subject to be on a suicide watch. But no one
cared. Not until it was too late.
My student was grappling with his own
identity conflicts. He was a women cased in a man’s body. You can’t be so in
the hinterland of India. Tongues were wagging all around, no one gave him the
space he needed to know himself, not even the ‘artist’ parents he was born to.
He too quit.(sad, he was just about to begin his soon to follow career after
working under an acclaimed fashion designer)
3 years back
My colleagues' son was an adolescent, full of
hope, a creative genius and struck by cupid. A simple refusal was all it took
for him to quit. He left behind some lovely hand-written poems.
These three people lost early in life had two
things in common: they were au fait and sensitive. In this
modern society, this is a lethal combination that works as a catalyst to suck
out the marrow of life.
Marx underlines this narrative of a conflict
in our ‘modern’ society: “having shown up the contradictions and
unnaturalness of modern life not only in the relationships of particular
classes, but in all circles and forms of modern intercourse.”
While most battling out life’s war, pre-
positioning themselves on suicidal radar, would say, “easier said than done.”I’d
be a bit optimistic in saying: “Life is not about giving up, it’s about
living it up…”
 |
| give warmth |
Too many youngsters resort
to self end owing to "abused friendship, deceived love, frustrated
ambition, family suffering, repressed rivalry, dissatisfaction with a
monotonous life, suppressed enthusiasm, are indubitably the causes of suicide
in more generously endowed natures, and the love of life itself, this energetic
driving force of personality, very often leads to putting an end to a
detestable existence ( Marx's note)." Most younglings
I have come in touch in person with confessing to attempt haven't given new
reasons. BUT! But I have heard an echo in their voices, "we want to
talk to someone, someone who understands us, not make fun of us or ignore
us".
We have grown in number but so in our lethal
deafness. Our purchasing power has gone up and we have conveniently replaced
warmth of relationships with goodies. Expensive mobile phones have enhanced
connectivity but severed connection. We rarely now connect with each other!!!
Right things at the right moment don’t happen all the time. One
has to have patience. Patience and life dive deep. On a very serious note,
family, friends, siblings can keep a slightly off the track being engaged
in mundane, frivolous talks. Tagging along or giving time to that suppressed
enthusiast will let him/her battle out the internal conflicts. Who doesn't have
an internal conflict? Everyone does, but we don't self end our existence! Do
we? Don’t die. Please! At least not by choice!
Every suicide breaks me down. They smack our
failure as individuals, as society.
Talks really help.
So talk…just talk!
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